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 EXTRA! EXTRA! read all about it!, bonus writings, some canon, some not
 Posted: Feb 3 2016, 05:45 AM

stella r. hines
 Posted: Feb 3 2016, 06:03 AM

written march 27th, 2013
not canon
Mom, shut up!

“Estella, sweetheart. I don’t understand why this is such a big deal. Would it really kill you to just try on a couple of dresses? I think it’s safe to say that they are just the nicest ones I’ve ever bought for you! They’ll really bring out your eyes, honey. Oh, and you know those heels I got you a week ago? The cream peep toe ones? Those would go perfectly wit—“

Mom, I swear TO GOD, IF YOU DON’T STO—

As if karma was slapping her right across the face, the doorbell interrupted Stella just as she’d interrupted her mother. Anything to get away from the woman, Stella hurriedly shouted, “I’ll get it!!” before either of her parents could answer it.

She tore from the room, sliding across the floor in her socks as she skidded to a stop in front of the door. Shoving her hair out of her face, Stella stomped (or as well as one as tiny as she could stomp) to the door and pulled it open.

She really wished she’d taken a look through the peep hole. For there, standing on her porch, was none other than Eddie Brooke. Her eyes opened so wide, she thought they might pop right out of their sockets.

“Estella, who is it?”

Giving a quiet shriek of alarm, she stepped outside, shoving Eddie back and slamming the door shut behind her. “Wha—what are you doing here?!” Stella tugged on her hair, giving him a very angry, startled, and almost pleading look.

What do you mean, ‘what am I doing here?’ We have a project to work on. Or, did you forget? Oh, wait. Haha. Of course you did,” how he kept a straight face like that, she'd never know. The books in his arms made it clear to her that he wasn’t lying.

Her urge to throttle him was forgotten as quickly as it’d come when she remembered that they did indeed have a project to work on. And that she’d invited him over here. … Why the fuck had she done that?!

She shook her head so fast, she was just a blur of ginger locks for a second. “No! No, no! Not today! Not now! Maybe… maybe in a couple o—” The door opened behind her and she dropped her face into her palms.

“Oh! Who’s this?”

Inhaling very sharply to fight back the tears that she could feel coming on, Stella turned to her mom and put on her prettiest smile. “Mom! This… uh, this is Eddie. He’s just… um, he’s,” she shot him a look over her shoulder.

Eddie was giving her the most bewildered look and Stella wondered what the hell his problem was, hadn’t they bonded over their smothers?! Shouldn’t he totally be on her side right now?! Why wasn’t he helping her come up with an excuse!

I’m her history partner.” The confusion was gone in two seconds flat and now he wore an expression of victory, looking so smug, she could just hit him across his stupid little face. Any points he’d earned recently were gone.

“Oh!!! How lovely!! Please, please, Eddie, do come in! Estella, dear, why didn’t you invite him in? Imagine how you must look out here in your pajamas, darling.” Her mother made a tsk noise and stepped back to let the teenagers into the house.

Two realizations hit her then:

1) She was standing on her porch in her pajamas (not that big a deal), shouting at Eddie Brooke (she was in her pajamas… in front of Eddie Brooke…) for all her neighbors to hear (great, maybe that’d sufficiently embarrass her mom).
2) He wasn’t taking her side because this was probably most definitely likely revenge for the Marker Mustache prank.

Stella let a scream out from between her teeth and disappeared in a flash, taking the stairs two at a time up to her room. She changed out of her PJ’s and into her normal lazy clothes faster than she ever had, and was back downstairs in no time.

She hadn’t wanted to leave her mother alone with Eddie for too long, but apparently even three minutes would do it. She could already hear her mom, gushing at Eddie about how well he got along with her precious Estella.

And hey, that made her feel a bit better, because it had to be hell for Eddie to be lying about their wonderful friendship, because hahaha, the two of them being friends, right.

But when she walked into the dining room, he seemed relaxed enough, a glass of tea in front of him, an amicable smile on his stupid little face. And… he… were the snippets of conversation she could hear… positive…?

Her shoulders slumped and she hung out quietly in the archway, waiting until one of them noticed her. What… what the hell? Either he was a really good liar, or he was telling the truth, and she wasn’t as horrible as she thought she was.

“Estella, sweetheart!”

Brought back to the real world from her reverie, Stella turned her confused gaze from Eddie to her mother and she hurriedly put on an uncertain smile. “Yeah?

“He’s absolutely lovely! Why haven’t you mentioned him to me before? I must say, he’s much better than that Silas boy who brought you home the other day.”

“Mom,” she ground out from behind clenched teeth, “he was making sure I made it safely.

“This neighborhood is perfectly safe enough without you needing a bodyguard. Anyway, I’ll go ahead and make some snacks for the two of you. It’s very important to study on a full stomach! Get started, then! Don’t mind me!”

And just like that, her mom was off to the kitchen, leaving the two of them alone. Stella avoided looking at Eddie as she made her way to the table, sitting down beside him. “So.

She’s not that bad.

All she could do was let out a harsh laugh, propping her chin up on her right hand. “Yeah, alright. What’re we working on today?” He gave her a strange look before organizing the books before them.

The two hours he was over weren’t entirely horrible, but Stella found herself wondering the entire time if he had been telling the truth about how she was a great partner, an energetic friend, and an all around interesting person.

written sept. 9, 2013

Stella stood in the doorway of one of their many shared classes. History, wasn’t it? Yeah, that’s right. This is the one they’d met in. And worked on that project. That they had totally aced. Like usual, she could spot him in the room immediately. Never mind that he’d been on the far side, by the windows, and there were at least two groups of students between them. Like usual, she’d given up on trying to understand why it was that way and to simply accept it. He turned to see who had called him, though she was sure he knew her voice by now, but he didn’t have a chance to say anything.

By the time he’d moved, she had already rushed into the room, pushing by the students who dared stand in her way. Didn’t everybody know by now to make room for her? She practically threw herself on him, arms wrapped tightly around his neck and her chin resting on his shoulder. The hug didn’t last long as she was too busy bouncing on her feet. She pulled away and smiled at him, all teeth and raised brows and excitement rolling off of her in waves. It wasn’t until she held the paper up to his face that anybody really realized she was holding the sheet at all.

I got an A!” She just about screeched, shoving the test into his hands. “Look, look!” She pointed to the grade at the top of the paper. A big red 100% in the left corner. The teacher had even gone so far as to add two exclamation points. “An actual A!” By now, the rest of the students had returned to their own conversations. They all were used to the whirlwind that Stella Hines was. And they were definitely used to, as Andie Read had coined them, Stellar. At this point, it was strange to see them apart. While before they had been arguing angrily and snapping nasty insults, anybody with any sort of sense at all could pick up on the inside jokes and shared laughter.

Anybody with eyes could tell the both of them were horribly obviously in love. When it all had changed was still a hot topic throughout the school. Having a rather small population, Baum’s grapevine didn’t often receive new things to gossip about. Some students thought it had to be when Eddie actually attended a track meet to cheer Stella on. Others thought it was clearly the blind date Aurora Rigby had set them up on. And yet there were still the, as Andie Read explained it, shippers that had seen this from the very beginning. Their friends included, the ones who had to put up with every gripe and complaint while trying not to shake some sense into the two, to help them just realize already, that they were meant to be.

Stella was still squealing, hopping from foot to foot, and clutching the paper in her hands again. The teacher entered the room just before the bell rang and the class settled down. Stella took her usual spot next to Eddie. The entire hour, she squirmed in her chair, wanting nothing more than to run home to show her parents. Ever since her mother had met Eddie, and what a day that had been, she’d lain off the pageants. There was some kind of resemblance to a proper mother/daughter relationship between the two now. Stella would be forever grateful to Eddie for it, and she still planned on doing the same for him and his mother.

The hour disappeared and the bell rang and Stella leapt out of her seat. She pulled Eddie in for another hug, promised to bother him at his locker, and then took off to get her last class out of the way. She intended to goof around with Jackson the entire time, knowing already that nothing productive would get done. How could she write an assembly speech when all she wanted to do was climb to the rooftops and scream “I ACED AN ASSIGNMENT!”

written july 7th, 2015
post that one icc that gave us all stellar feels / canon
Stella wasn't quiiiitteee sure what was going on.

All of her really good friends were in the chat room, plus Heidi who might as well just be a good friend already after this. Stella hadn't reaallllyyy meant to be present after she took her pain meds but Nahnie had told her to text Eddie and tell him to join and she couldn't just leave the chat after inviting him, could she? She didn't think the medicine would mess with her thaaaaat much seeing as she had been fine every other time she'd taken them. Then again, she'd fallen asleep pretty soon after, and so she never knew what she would be like.

Apparently she would be affectionate and confused and sassy. Her friends kept typing things in parentheses and Nahnie and Jackson seemed to have gone over to Aurora's (how did Eddie know Aurora, Stella wondered, Aurora was really pretty, Stella bet that she and Eddie were cute) and Heidi was sneaky. Sneaky Heidi tricked Stella into saying who she loved most but Stella supposed it was okay because then Eddie said he loved her most too and that made her feel nice and warm, along with her already numb fuzzies. Typing got progressively more difficult just like her memory got worse. She knew she wouldn't remember any of this the next day, and knowing herself, she probably wouldn't think to check the chat's backlogs.

Even if she did, what was she going to do with all of this new information? Was it new? Was it information? If anything, it was just a mess of feelings and things she never would have said under normal circumstances. Never mind that she definitely would and had made the joke about Jackson and his girlfriends before. It was probably unnecessarily mean and it was apparently too soon but she had apologized because Jackson seemed irritated and she didn't want him to be annoyed with her. The same had gone with Nahnie when Stella had decided not to tell her secret (what it even was, she didn't remember) and Stella, in her current state of mind, had been legit worried that Nahnie wouldn't want to be her friend anymore. It had been scary, to say the least.

It had been a little weird, being aware that they were talking about her like she wasn't there, but she'd been a little too light headed to really care. She kind of knew the drugs were affecting her and she kind of knew she was saying a lot of things she didn't know she was or would later regret and she kind of knew Eddie was, on some level, flirting. None of those kind of knew things had mattered, though, because she was sleepy and numb and mostly incoherent. None of it would matter tomorrow, she had thought, might as well have fun with it now. And it had been. Lots of fun. Candy Crushes and people agreeing with her and Jesus taking the wheels and flowers and Queen Heidi and turtles.

Eddie saying her name a lot, Eddie being cute with everybody, Eddie accepting that she didn't want to tell her secret, Eddie offering to carry her around, Eddie tucking her in, Eddie saying he loved her most. Eddie saying he loved her most. Eddie. Loved her most. All she could think about was Eddie and it didn't help that he kissed her on the forehead as he tucked her in, even as she muttered something about how neither of them had won the challenge yet, that she didn't deserve kisses. She was pretty sure he said something, sounding amused, about how she always deserved kisses., but maybe she was imagining it. She hadn't wanted him to leave, honestly, but that little kiss on the forehead had instantly made everything okay -- no, not okay, perfect. Whatever phantom pains would have woken her up in the night didn't and she slept more peacefully than she had since breaking her leg.

aurora m. rigby
 Posted: Feb 3 2016, 06:16 AM

NOTES: my version of the carsora reunion / written 7/11/15, posted 7/22/15 / probably not canon.

She doesn't hear it or she ignores it or she's blissfully unaware of it. Even if she had heard it, there is no way Carson is in New York. Aurora had accepted Aracelli with open arms and non-stop crying. Carson isn't in New York because he has no reason to be.


It's harder to not hear or ignore or be blissfully unaware of it the second time. It sounds from right behind her and her vision goes dark. She doesn't scream or hit, just jumps out of her skin.

"Guess who?"

Aurora takes his wrists and yanks the hands from her eyes. She lets go immediately as if burned and somehow gets out of her chair and away from him. Everything is the same. Her gaze moves up and down, as if to find something different, as if to find anything that tells her Carson isn't here in New York. Everything is the same.

"Rora." He says again and her heart restarts and she steps back.

"What are you doing here?" She manages some how, voice strong and angry. She doesn't know how because her hands are shaking and her breaths are already coming short. He just smiles at her, a Cheshire-esque grin, and she fights every urge to resist bolting. This isn't right.

He laughs. He actually has the nerve to laugh. "I go here now." She is so angry. "What do you mean you go here now?" He steps closer to her and she moves back again. It is painfully familiar to the last time she saw him in an alleyway. "Well, I couldn't very well stay in Iowa by myself, could I?"

She can't believe this. How many reunions is she going to have at this school? She might cry. Hands curled into fists, she shakes her head. "No." "No what?" "No. You can't be here." "I am."

"Rora. Please." "Don't. Don't call me that." She steps closer only to grab her book off the table. "Don't come near me. Don't come near me or Aracelli or Jackson. Just. Don't. I don't want. Anything to do with you."

"Rora." He says, frowning, and the pain in his eyes looks real. Before she can do anything about it, he's closed the distance between them, and he's hugging her. Whatever resolve she had to not cry in front of him in this library is broken. She drops her book and wraps her arms around him as if the scar on her hip isn't there. As if he never got into the drug scene, as if everything is still perfect.

She thinks how disappointed her mother would be, how angry Aracelli would be. She wonders why, she wonders how, the library of all places. Why not the halls or the common room or the cafeteria? She cannot believe this is happening. His rubbing small circles on her back and his hand is combing through her hair and she's crying. God, she missed him.

"Rora," he says, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for everything. I never... I never meant to hurt you." And the way his breath hitches, the way his voice cracks, she believes him. She's always thought he never meant to hurt her. "I'm sorry," he says again. He's crying and she doesn't want that.

She never wants any of her friends to cry. Is he really her friend? Did they ever really break up? What would Aracelli do? ... What would Aracelli do? Aracelli wouldn't hug him, Aracelli would punch him in the face. Aurora pulls back, out of the embrace, and shoves him away, stumbling back. "No. No, no, no, no. I can't. I can't do this."

He reaches out for her and when she holds her arms out to stop him, he takes her wrist in his hand. "Please, can we just talk? Go get coffee?" "No, no. No, I can't. I can't go get coffee with you." He seems determined, though, taking her other hand in his. "Please." He looks so sincere.

Aracelli would punch him in the face. Aurora... would not. Aurora would go get coffee and listen to his explanation and accept his apology. Aurora should know better but she doesn't and so she nods. "Okay." She lets him lead her out of the library and through campus. She wonders what the students must be thinking. What sort of gossip is this going to lead to?

What a mess, she thinks. When they sit down for coffee at a cafe down the street, he never lets go of her hand, and she wonders if she'll regret this, if she's making the right choices? It's not just the pastries that are sweet and she genuinely hopes he has changed, that he is here to reconcile, and maybe things would start looking up from now on.

NOTES: cute definitely canon carsora things bc of this tumblr post / written 12/10/15

aurora counts, grinning, trying not to laugh every time carson comes face to face with her.


she finds it more and more difficult to not giggle the longer this goes on but she does her best to keep a straight face.


she returns the kiss mid-count, blushing, not expecting it. he smiles at her, slightly wicked.


she wonders when he will grow tired and if she'll have to worry about him falling on top of her. not that she would mind, honestly.


aurora carefully reaches up to mess with her hair, slowly so as not to distract carson.


he looks a little winded but she finds it hard to believe that he's done before hitting twenty.


he kisses her again, short and sweet, and she covers her face with her hands, turning red.


"think i'm almost finished here, darling,"

"twenty. already?"

"what's that supposed to mean?"

"twenty one. nothing!"

he smiles at her again, mischievous, and she knows immediately that he's up to something.

"i can literally see the plan forming in your eyes, carson,"

"i have no idea what you're talking about, rora,"

"twenty three,"

aurora rolls her eyes.

"twenty four. you aren't very good at pretending you haven't got something up your sleeve."

"i'm not wearing sleeves."

"twenty five. i noticed."

that sounds much more suggestive than she means for it to and she sees the look in his eyes that tells her he notices the tone as well. he doesn't say anything as she counts each push up for a little while.

"thirty seven. i'm impressed."

"are you?"

aurora shrugs as best she can while laying on her back.

"oh, i'm hurt!"

she laughs,


and suddenly he's on top of her and she squeals, flailing her arms and kicking her feet.


he just laughs and keeps his body pressed against hers, kissing her all over, and her face feels hot. she gains control of her limbs finally and takes his face in her hands.

"get off of me, you dummy!"

"that's not very nice, rora,"

he goes into full on pout and she wiggles underneath him.

"let me up!"

"what's the magic word?"

aurora shakes her head,


carson sighs,

"well, i guess we're stuck like this forever."

aurora struggles some more before seemingly giving up. instead of saying please, though, she reaches for carson's sides and tickles him. he catches on right away and puts a stop to her antics by grabbing her wrists and pinning them above her head. she goes a little breathless but he doesn't seem to notice.

"so that's how you want to play, huh?"

he's wearing still the cheshire grin and without knowing how he does it so quickly, he's got both her wrists in one hand, and his other goes to her waist where he proceeds to tickle her rather relentlessly.


she yells, laughing, squirming even more, trying to pull her hands free. she moves to draw her legs up but he keeps his weight on her. she can't stop laughing, tears pricking her eyes, and she think she might die if she doesn't get a breath in.

"magic word!"


carson lets go of her wrists and starts tickling her with renewed fervor. she's too tired to move her arms in any helpful way, instead just bringing them in towards her face where she presses her palms to her eyelids.

"give up yet?"

"okay, okay! please let me up!"

he stops instantly and gently takes her wrists in his hands again, pulling them away from her eyes. she blinks up at him, tears streaming down her cheeks, and trying to catch her breath. he doesn't make it easy to do so by leaning down and kissing her. she runs her fingers through his hair and he presses his hands against the floor on either side of her head to keep himself propped up. she doesn't know how long this lasts but he pulls back eventually and she tries to see passed the stars in her vision.

"maybe, maybe we could,"


he says without hesitating, finally moving all the way off of her. he takes her offered hand, pulling her up off the floor. he scoops her up and she wraps her legs around his hips and her arms around his neck. she honestly thinks they don't make it to his bedroom quick enough.

stella r. hines
 Posted: Feb 13 2016, 01:33 AM

written jan-feb, 2016
please tell me why you were napping in the freshly dried blankets while they were still in the dryer / canon
"Stella?" Eddie called, once making sure the front door was locked. "Are you home?" Her car was still in the driveway but it wouldn't surprise him if she had gone out for a run. He had expected her to stay in given that it was the first of February, but it hadn't snowed recently, and the sun had been annoyingly persistent during every errand he had taken care of. He set the bags of groceries down and took his shoes off, leaving them against the wall. No answer so far which left him feeling quite certain that Stella was out. He put everything away patiently and slowly, as he did with most chores, making sure the pantry and refrigerator were organized so that the oldest produce and meats got used first. They had everything they would need for pasta that night if Stella felt like it but the coupon on the counter of her favorite takeout was a pretty clear sign of what she would be up for when it came to dinner.

He left everything as he had found it in the kitchen and headed down the hall to their bedroom to see if maybe Stella was actually home, and had just been sleeping when he got back. The laundry room door was open, one they normally kept closed, and he stopped to look in. The washer wasn't running but had also been left open which was a pet peeve of Stella's and his brows furrowed in confusion. He stepped in to close it when he noticed the light on the dryer was on which meant a load of laundry had been finished but not emptied. Shutting the lid on the washer, he knelt down to open the dryer and was more than surprised to find Stella curled up inside. Her legs were pulled tight against her chest and she was wrapped up somehow in all the blankets that had been cleaned. Had her bright hair not stuck out so clearly among the dark sheets, he might not have noticed her. "Stella," he started, sighing in the way he knew she liked to hear the most, and she stirred, eyes blinking open slowly.

She'd always been a light sleeper and she must not have been as out of it as he thought for her to be roused so easily. She smiled at him, as if finding nothing wrong with the situation. "Welcome home," she said, her voice quiet and low. "Please tell me why you were napping in the freshly dried blankets," he said immediately, frowning slightly, "while they were still in the dryer." Stella must not have liked the look on his face because her own expression fell and her face turned red slowly as she seemingly struggled to tell the truth. "I... was cold," she answered honestly, avoiding his gaze, "and you weren't here." It was his turn to blush but he tried not to focus on that. "Come here," he said, and she untangled herself from the covers as quickly as she could in the tight space. It wasn't the best way she could have done it but Stella always made things complicated for herself when they really didn't need to be; all she actually managed to do was get herself turned around so that her back was to Eddie. He could tell in the way her shoulders were tensing that a meltdown was on its way and, not thinking something as ridiculous as this warranted a reaction like that, Eddie reached forward to help her.

He hooked his arms underneath hers and pulled her out, glad that the laundry room was spacious. He rose as she kicked the blankets off of her until she was wobbling on the tiled floor. "Cold," she said immediately, shaking one of her feet upon noticing that a sheet was still somehow tied around her ankle. Eddie rolled his eyes and scooped her up without much warning, grinning when she squealed in surprise. With one arm wrapped beneath her knees and the other around her back, Stella held on by keeping her arms loose around his neck. She felt warmer to the touch than usual (even for being where he had found her) and Eddie wondered if something was wrong but she was talking a mile a minute before he could ask. "I'm sorry, it just seemed like a good idea at the time. I was going to take all the blankets out of the dryer and go back to the bedroom, but... I don't know." He couldn't interrupt to tell her she had no reason to apologize and he (correctly) assumed it was because she didn't want him saying so. "How was grocery shopping? Did you see the nice lady at self check out that I like the best? Was the line at the post office bad? What are we having for dinner? You saw what I left on the counter, yeah?"

Eddie rolled his eyes, smiling still. They made it to their room and he let her down right next to her slippers. She slid her feet in immediately, ignoring now the blanket attached to her ankle. "I did see her and she says hello. She told me to make sure you come next time." Stella groaned, never looking forward to running errands, "The post office was pleasantly empty. I thought we might have pasta but yes, I saw your coupon." Stella seemed to consider before leaving the room and making her way to the kitchen. "Spaghetti or Alfredo?" She asked as he followed her, careful not to step on the sheet. "Whichever." Stella hummed and looked into the pantry, nodding with apparent approval at all the new stock. "Are you feeling okay?" Eddie asked and Stella looked at him, brows raised in surprise. When she hesitated, he knew she probably wasn't feeling okay. "Just a little achy, I guess?" Stella shrugged, grabbing the coupon off the counter, and the house phone next. "No biggie, what did you want?" Eddie wasn't having it; he took both things from her, set them down, took her hand, and led her to the dining table. "Eddie," she whined, "I'm fine." "Do you remember what happened last time you said you were fine and you weren't?"

Stella blushed, partially in frustration, mostly in shame. The last time she had lied about feeling sick had led to pneumonia. "You were warmer than usual even though you had just come out of the dryer." There was a sentence Eddie never thought he would say. "So I'll ask again: are you feeling okay?" Stella hesitated, again, before sighing. She seemed to shrink into the chair, as if admitting to feeling unwell was a huge burden on him, and that by disappearing she could make sure it didn't happen. "I am a little achy but I've also had a headache since this morning and my temperature is higher than it should be." "How much higher?" Eddie asked, going to retrieve the thermometer from a cupboard. She never understood why they kept it in the kitchen, honestly. "Last I checked, it was... 102? Maybe?" Stella didn't see Eddie's brows knit together in concern but she could feel it. "Where are you sore?"

"It's not meningitis," Stella answered immediately, and when Eddie gave her a bewildered look, she continued. "I checked WebMD. It said neck stiffness was meningitis and it isn't my neck." Eddie rolled his eyes, handing her the thermometer. Stella turned it on and stuck it underneath her tongue, waiting for the beep. Eddie stayed quiet, watching as the number settled. It landed on an even 100 and Eddie frowned. Stella took the device from her mouth and stood, "Eddie, really, I'm fine! Let's be real, I'd rather be this warm, anyway. I just need to sleep it off." Eddie went to the refrigerator where he searched for a moment before pulling out a Tupperware container. Stella followed, almost tripping on the sheet attached to her still. "We're not having takeout," he said, and Stella responded with an indignant cry. "We still have leftover chicken noodle soup from Aurora." "I don't want soup!" "Stella." She glowered at Eddie, arms crossed tightly over her chest.

He was completely unfazed, moving passed her to heat up the leftovers. "Glare at me all you want. I'm not letting you win this one." His choice of words set her off and she stormed from the kitchen. Eddie didn't follow, instead just focusing on the task at hand. He knew Stella would cool down eventually; ever since they'd gotten married, her temper tantrums didn't last nearly as long as they did when they had first met. Besides, she had ranted and raving about Aurora's cooking, he was sure it would lure her back in no time. By the time Stella returned, Eddie had two bowls of soup ready, a mug of Stella's favorite tea, and Netflix set up in the living room. She had changed into her Gryffindor pajama pants and an over sized sweater; her hair was tied up and the sheet that had been wrapped around her ankle was gone. Settling on the couch, legs curled underneath her, Stella took the offered bowl, holding it tightly, and taking a deep breath in. "I'm sorry for over-reacting."

Eddie sat next to her, his own bowl on the table next to the couch, and shook his head. "No need to apologize," she shot him a look, which he ignored, "what do you want to watch?" They settled on some RomCom and she stayed quiet through it, finishing her soup quickly, and taking her time with the tea. She was asleep with her head on a pillow on Eddie's lap before the movie was finished. He turned the television off and moved slowly and carefully so as not to wake her. By some miracle, she wasn't bothered, and he had her tucked in without any problems. Eddie pressed a kiss to her forehead before pulling the door mostly shut behind him and leaving to clean up in the kitchen. Stella would end up arguing with him in the morning for not waking her up so she could help but he would just ask her if she was feeling better and she would, begrudgingly, tell him yes. Even after all their years together, Stella hated to admit when he was right.

stella r. hines
 Posted: Oct 10 2016, 04:13 PM

written october 10, 2016

dare to write prompt 'starshaping'
stella might have been bright, and loud, and colorful, but between the two of them, she was sure eddie was the sun.

eddie might have been muted, and reserved, and grayscale, but between the two of them, she had to be the moon.

before eddie, stella’s life had been one of the things she hated most: boring. it had been the same every day, the same attitude, and the same hobbies, and the same whispered frustrations from people that were supposed to be friends. she had fallen into a routine, one that consisted of activities that just annoyed others. it was one that she had never been able to pull herself from.

and then she had met eddie.

they had hated each other. there was no doubt that stella had ever loathed a person as entirely as she had him. she knew the sentiment was shared, that they would never be civil, that once their project was finished, that would be it. he would be free of her and she would go back to what she knew best.

they got a passing grade.

they didn’t stop talking.

eddie changed her. stella hated change.

moving to new york from arizona had been too big of a change for her, one that took longer for her to adjust to than was normal. she didn’t realize even the differences in her personality until a few years of friendship with her history partner. she was in better control of her tone, of her temper, of her self. from the outside looking in, one could assume something had happened with stella that had dampened her spirits, that something awful had ruined her.

eddie was a shining beacon, a light that had blinded her. she’d had no idea until their first kiss, sitting in a hallway, the backs of their peers turned to them, her heart pounding, her breathing uneven. memories flashing against her eyelids when she retreated to her room, arguments and bets and

{apologies underneath stormy clouds, knees knocking against each other in the library, kisses she might have imagined on her forehead in a haze of pain medication, arms pressed against each other while snowflakes danced across the television screen, confessions that broke her heart and stitched it back together one song later}

she had been blinded when their lips met for a second time. there wasn’t any thing more spectacular about this one and the next had just knocked the breath out of her, and not for any good reason. what a mess that day had been, what a disaster the two of them had been. she woke up with her head on his shoulder, the credits rolling on a documentary she had not even made it half an hour through.

she loved him.

she had never loved anybody before.

how could she have, when she wasn’t even capable of feeling so kindly towards herself? the confidence was fake the majority of the time, her bravado just enough to keep others from finding her out. eddie was one of the few privy to her self-esteem issues and he hadn’t left her to deal with it on her own. he had stayed. she always assumed people wouldn't stay, that she would be alone until the day she died.

eddie was the sun, glowing and warm and filling every dark corner with rays of reassurance and sincerity. his eyes were like the blue sky above her and the green grass below her feet, and sometimes, if she looked long enough, they were gems and galaxies. he might have preferred the cold, but there was an inexplicable heat that left her tingling anytime he touched her.

she had to be the moon, luminescent and frosty and insisting she had an influence similar to that of the lunar pulling of the tides. while she might have been a closer embodiment of yang than yin, stella couldn't shake the comparison of her boyfriend (maybe her fiancé one day, her husband another, her soulmate for as long as she lived) to the star that she physically better represented. there really couldn’t be one without the other, anyway, right?

and when she watched him, with the softest of smiles, and hearts in her eyes, and butterflies in her stomach, it could be said of the same appreciation people gazed at the night sky with. eddie was the sun, and occasionally the moon, because maybe they switched, with her burning and he smoldering, but he would always be the stars, and she would never tire of constellations and meteorites, lights twinkling against the ebony backdrop.

stella r. hines
 Posted: Jan 2 2017, 10:00 AM

stars make no noise
nanowrimo day one
outer space is supposed to be very cold.

you wouldโ€™t know because youโ€™ve never been but thatโ€™s what everybody says. thatโ€™s what it says in all of the textbooks and on the podcasts and told by the officials.

itโ€™s supposed to be very quiet, too.

you wouldnโ€™t know because youโ€™ve never been. you wouldnโ€™t know because you arenโ€™t very smart. you donโ€™t give yourself a lot of credit. you know some things, you suppose. useless things but at least you arenโ€™t entirely incapable.

you were trying to make a point. what was it? outer space was cold and outer space was quiet.

eddie had started out cold and quiet. he had been entirely your opposite. he still was, in a lot of ways, but at least now you could see beyond those differences. just like how he saw passed your flaws, your edges, your faults. you had so many faults. every day, you wonder how you ever are lucky enough to have him in your life.

eddie had started out cold. you had started out burning. one comment, not intended to be offensive, and you had nearly flipped a table in your anger. you had exploded, hissing and clawing, overreacting as you tended to do. he hadnโ€™t meant anything by it, assuring you that he hadnโ€™t meant it in the way youโ€™d assumed. you still arenโ€™t sure whether or not he had unintentionally complimented you in that moment. maybe youโ€™d ask him one day.

eddie had started out quiet. you had started out loud. he had a lot to say, you eventually learned, but he was very good at getting his point across. short and quick, no dawdling, no back and forth. it took you an embarrassingly long amount of time to figure out what you wanted to say. long, rambling sentences that sometimes didnโ€™t even make it back to the beginning. it was who you were, it wasnโ€™t something you could have helped if you wanted to.

one day, the two of you make a bet. for one whole day, you arenโ€™t allowed to talk, and eddie isnโ€™t allowed to use proper grammar. you think you might actually lose this one. talking is your trademark.

outer space is very quiet and stars make no noise and if you are a star, you are the sun, and you can make no noise. eddie is a star, too, though. heโ€™s the falling star that you make wishes on, the second star to the right that peter pan and wendy darling flew away to, glowing evangeline that ray the firefly is in love with. youโ€™re in love with eddie, but you donโ€™t know it at the time. all you know is that thereโ€™s a bet youโ€™re going to lose but you want to win.

somehow, you win, when eddie sends a text with two minutes to spare, using proper grammar. you bolt to his room, shouting at the top of your lungs, teasing and mocking while he buries his face in his pillow.

some days, you are quiet and cold. eddie doesnโ€™t have many days where he is loud and burning. you usually have to do something really stupid and reckless to upset him. you can count on one hand how many times youโ€™ve heard that accent. you try not to bring up the day of the marker mustache because that day led to an online chat you regret and a conversation at the docks you regret. you donโ€™t regret the hug, though. you donโ€™t regret the taxi ride back together.

some days, you just need to be alone. but being alone is never good for you. last time you were alone, you ended up in the hospital with a broken leg, because you didnโ€™t want to bother your friends. last time you were alone, you skipped your classes and didnโ€™t eat, and cried all over pennie, spilling your deepest and darkest secrets. you and alone do not get along well but sometimes you just need it. everybody needs it sometimes. โ€จโ€จon days you spend alone, you are quiet but your thoughts are not. of all the fairy tale creatures to be a reincarnate of, you got stuck with an irritated hare that lost a race, and is intent on you losing everything you care about to make up for it.

on days you spend alone, you are cold but you are not. youโ€™re a being that seems to be constantly warmer than others, always a few degrees higher than the rest. it might have something to do with the sun thing, maybe it is because you grew up in a desert, maybe it is because eddie is your soulmate and opposites attract and if he is cold, you have to be hot. itโ€™s okay, you like being warm. on days you spend alone, you are cold in every sense except for your temperature. icy fingertips, chattering teeth, an empty black sky inside of you, biting and unforgiving.

stars make no noise. the universe ships stellar. constellations and meteorites and galaxies. you like to think the world orbits around you, much like planets do around the sun. you are the sun, arenโ€™t you, in a lot of ways? nothing orbits around you, though, you arenโ€™t worth that much. you can hardly keep your own life in control. what a mess you are, stella. pretend all you like that youโ€™ve got your life together but itโ€™s easy to see. youโ€™re a fraying knot, a cracked frame, a door off its hinges. you are nothing, stella hines, you arenโ€™t worth anythingโ€”

you know that isnโ€™t true.

eddie is cold and eddie is quiet but he loves you.

pennie loves you, and aurora loves you, and jackson and nannie and parker, and your parents love you, yes even your mother despite your arguments. you are worth so much and there isnโ€™t anything a stupid rabbit from a story written ages, written eons, ago can say thatโ€™ll make you think otherwise.

let all of your days alone try, let the darkness try. you dare it to pull you down, to hold you in its grasp. suffocating and heavy and stifling as it may be, there would always be a light to guide you back, to show you the way home, to eddieโ€™s open and waiting arms, soft smiles and kind eyes and a gentle voice, sometimes whispering absentmindedly, sometimes singing, sometimes humming. always quiet, always cold, but he complements your noise and your heat, and you fit perfectly against his side, your hand slotted into his like a puzzle piece.

stars make no noise and while you always have something to say, you find you donโ€™t mind the peaceful moments. sometimes they are on overcast days, with the pitter patter of raindrops lulling you to sleep. sometimes, it has just snowed, and the world is blanketed in silence. sometimes, everything feels muted because the clouds hang heavy in the sky and block out the sun.

there was a point. werenโ€™t you making a point? thereโ€™s a violin playing and the quiet tinkling of glass and you realize you are holding your breath. why are you holding your breath? tears are gathered at the corners of your eyes and you blink to clear them. they run down your cheeks and you inhale, quietly silently shakily, dropping back into reality, finding yourself exactly where you were when you apparently left.

eddie is knelt before you, on one knee, and a ring glitters. stars make no noise just like you arenโ€™t making any noise because you are shell (ha ha, wait until you tell him that one) shocked and your brain is so busy flashing back to the years of knowing him that you canโ€™t speak. no is the correct answer because you cannot do this to him, you cannot let him live his life out with someone like you. no would break your heart and it would break his heart and it is not what you want to say. the hare is fidgeting in the back of your mind, a caged animal that youโ€™ve gotten very good at ignoring. he is obviously not okay with this, wanting nothing to do with the tortoise, the creature the love of your life is stuck with. youโ€™re both stuck, arenโ€™t you?

yes finally makes it passed your filter, passed your walls. it breaks down the barrier of nerves and hesitation and uncertainty of the future. you love him, so much, and you want nothing more than to spend the rest of your life with him. the relief on his face, in the air, is palpable and your hands are shaking and his hands are shaking, but he slips the ring onto your finger, and you cry, tears pouring hot down your cheeks. there is cheering from the strangers around you but your focus is on eddie and his sea glass eyes and the smile youโ€™ve got memorized and he pulls you in, arms wrapped tight around you. your hands are shaking and you are looking at the ring over his shoulder but it is nothing but a blur in front of your eyes, everything is bokeh lights like in the photos aurora likes best, and you can imagine your friends and their reactions now.

you know already nannie and aurora will cry, their ship is so far out at sea. andie will crack a joke, jackson will ruffle your hair, pennie will scream, and youโ€™ll ask her eventually to be your maid of honor, and oh your mother. your mother loves eddie, sheโ€™ll be so happy, and your father, too, and there is so much happiness ahead of you. no amount of stress or days alone will ever take this moment away from you, nothing will ever tarnish this night.

i love you, he says, whispering into your hair, and it sends shivers down your spine.

i love you more, you say in turn, laughter in your voice.

i love you most, he challenges and, oh, is it on.

ยฉ laurie.

stella r. hines
 Posted: Jan 2 2017, 10:10 AM

burned fingertips
nanowrimo day ten

well, it certainly wouldnโ€™t be a birthday celebration for the books.

everything that could go wrong had so far gone wrong and stella had zero expectations for the rest of the night. she had only six hours until midnight and then she could officially consider this birthday over. she wasnโ€™t sure why sheโ€™d even expected much. she was living on her own, had skipped school this semester, and currently wasnโ€™t on speaking terms with her mother. she had basically dug herself a nice grave to crawl into should she decide to and it was looking all the more promising.

maybe she ought to just break it down into tiny little pieces and that would make it easier to deal with.

one. living on her own. it was apparently something she should never have done. stella was lazy. even if she had gotten angry at eddie for it all those years ago, it was the truth. she hated cleaning, she hated cooking, she hated responsibilities. and so her apartment often went unkempt and covered in takeout boxes until she finally grew sick of her own filth and took care of the mess. she didnโ€™t have a roommate which meant she had to pay rent on her own. that part was easy, though, because her father helped her whenever she asked it. not that she asked it often because she was a strong, independent woman who could take care of herself (hah, good one, stella!). it helped that she had a well paying job which, on its own, was some miracle, given her lack of any sort of degree. it certainly didnโ€™t hurt that her sweet old landlady seemed to like stella quite a lot and had waived all utility fees. while there was a sense of freedom that came with being on her own, stella thrived on the company of others, and had had many Days where she simply did not leave bed because she didnโ€™t have any reasons to. she really needed a roommate, honestly.

two. skipping school this semester. it had been an easy decision on her behalf but literally everybody that she cared about had disagreed with her. her parents hadnโ€™t understood why, her friends had insisted she take at least one class, her advisor wondered if something was wrong. there wasnโ€™t anything wrong! stella was just feeling overwhelmed and stressed and the best way for her to get over it was to take a step back and give herself some time to breathe. it wasnโ€™t like her degree mattered, anyway. she was just taking general education courses right now until she figured out what she wanted to major in. school had never been her thing and so it shouldnโ€™t have surprised anyone just how quickly the weight of college had pulled her down. it was so much more than high school had ever been and while she should have expected it, stella figured barrie wouldnโ€™t give her too much trouble, especially compared to the other colleges in new york. honestly, skipping this semester had been one of the best decisions sheโ€™d made in a long time. she was available to work more which meant more money which meant more treat yourself days. she missed her friends, mostly, and she knew had she been at class today, she wouldโ€™ve received much more love than she had from lazing about her apartment.

three. not on speaking terms with her mother. it had started because she was skipping school. her mother had been aloof and unreachable for a few weeks afterwards before seeming to accept that whatever made her daughter happy made her happy. that hadnโ€™t lasted long. with all this free time, stella, surely you could book a few modeling gigs, for me! honestly, stella shouldn't have been surprised. while she had been grateful that her mother had finally dropped the beauty pageant thing, she had swung right back into it with basically grown up beauty pageants. stella had the legs and figure and the hair for modeling and it would bring in enough cash to pay a months worth of rent but come on. if stella had hated pageants, there was no way in hell she would like modeling. she was terrible at following directions and she was far too expressive to ever accomplish whatever photographer was yelling at her at any given time. she hated heels and dresses and she was way too self-conscious to see herself in any sort of magazine. her mother had been persistent, though, and stella had gone off on her like she never had before. cue the waterworks and the claims of after all iโ€™ve done for you and the, honestly, complete lack of care for what stella wanted. it was a mutual cold shoulder at this point, but stella knew she would last the longest. she always did.

so there it wasโ€ฆ and it had not helped.

not being at school meant not seeing her friends. living alone meant not having a roomie to celebrate with her. ignoring her mother meant not a single call. her father had at least wished her a happy birthday and it wasnโ€™t like her friends werenโ€™t, either! sure, sheโ€™d gotten plenty of posts to her facebook wall, and lots of tweets from her followers (they were just strangers, though, who liked her stupid stunts and adventures with eddie). pennie had swung over in the morning with a card and promises of way more gifts later on. eddie had dropped by to give her a kiss on the cheek and a card as well, reminding her that they had dinner that night. the butterflies in her stomach had only just recently gone back to rest after receiving a text from him. how sheโ€™d gotten so lucky, she would never know, but she supposed she had aurora and nahnie to thank.

somehow, amongst every other little thing bothering her, she suddenly had burned fingertips.

swearing loudly, stella dropped the dishes in the sink and danced away from the counter. โ€œfuck, fuck, fuck!โ€ she cried, blowing at the burns, ignoring the tears pricking the corners of her eyes. โ€œgod damn it! shit! fuck!โ€ she hurried back to the faucet, turning the knob the complete other direction and waiting two whole seconds before sticking her hand beneath the spray. the water got cooler by the second until it finally eventually began to relieve her, if just barely, of the pain. it was always the tiniest nerves that hurt the most. โ€œjesus fucking christ,โ€ she groaned, sagging against the counter, feeling suddenly exhausted.

there was a knock at the door and the sound of keys turning in the lock.

it was either eddie or pennie and so she didnโ€™t fret. focusing instead on blocking out the pain, stella ran a towel under the water, and wrapped her fingertips up in it, before turning the faucet off.

โ€œstella?โ€ eddie.

โ€œin the kitchen,โ€ she responded, hearing already the tightness in her voice, like a string pulled taut.

โ€œare you okay?โ€ he was asking before heโ€™d even seen her, something being set down, before his footsteps headed her direction.

โ€œpeachy,โ€ she answered, grabbing an ice pack from the freezer, and wrapping her still damp rag around that. she pressed her fingertips to it just as eddie draped himself over her.

โ€œhi,โ€ he murmured into her ear, sending goosebumps up her arms, before pressing a kiss to her cheek.

โ€œhi,โ€ she muttered, turning to meet his lips with her own, stealing a peck, before stepping away. she could practically feel him pouting but she put distance still between them. โ€œhow was class?โ€ she asked, not looking his way, paying more attention to the way droplets of water were racing down her skin.

โ€œwhatโ€™s wrong?โ€ he inquired instead, not moving any closer, as if he knew that she needed her space.




โ€œyou know you can talk to me.โ€

โ€œi know. thereโ€™s nothing to talk about.โ€

there was a pause and she, again, could sense his expression without actually seeing it. she knew she wasnโ€™t being fair. eddie deserved to know when she was feeling upset and she knew that he was one of the few who could actually make her feel better but maybe she just didnโ€™t want to feel better. maybe she deserved to feel like this.

โ€œare we still on for dinner?โ€ his tone broke down whatever stupid wall she was building between them. she turned, just in time to see his lips raising in a forced smile. he might have been better at hiding his emotions than she had ever been, but for all their years together, sheโ€™d picked up on a few things.

โ€œiโ€™m sorry,โ€ she sighed, setting aside the ice pack, and closing the gap between them. she wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her head against his chest. โ€œi didnโ€™t mean to be snappy.โ€

โ€œyouโ€™ve got nothโ€”โ€

โ€œโ€”ing to apologize for. i know.โ€

โ€œthatโ€™s not funny,โ€ he said in a tone that suggested it was actually quite funny. they stayed like that a few minutes longer, until stella felt the weight of the world lift off of her shoulders. everything that had bothered her before seemed Infinitesimal and the lingering pain in her fingertips was all but gone.

โ€œthank you,โ€ she said, breaking the silence.


they pulled apart and she took a deep breath before smiling up at him. โ€œyes, weโ€™re still on for dinner.โ€

he took her by the shoulders and turned her out of the kitchen, giving her a little push. โ€œwell, go get ready then!โ€

stella rolled her eyes, heading to her bedroom, ignoring the urge to tell him he didnโ€™t have to worry about it when she heard the faucet turn back on, and dishes being cleaned.

it was her birthday, after all.

ยฉ laurie.

stella r. hines
 Posted: Jan 2 2017, 10:19 AM

burning skies / light dusting
nanowrimo day fifteen

stella misses home.

new york city should be her home now but it isnโ€™t. she isnโ€™t sure that it ever will be.

they say home is where the heart is. stella is torn. there is so many places to explore in the concrete jungle and she could imagine her heart settling here, nestled between skyscrapers, and beating to the rhythm of time square. just as well, her heart is cozy within the dips of mountains, and it thrives in the heat of the desert.

stella misses the burning skies of an arizona sunset but she doesnโ€™t mind the light dusting of a sunrise in new york.

there are oranges and yellows alike. while reds and pinks are prominent back home, the city that never sleeps proudly displays deep blues and purples. it is all beautiful, if stella is honest, and she canโ€™t complain of what the city has to offer. watching the sun disappear behind the skyline is almost as lovely as watching it rise over summits.

she cannot say the same for the weather.

stella is a very warmblooded individual and she relished in the summer, when temperatures reached one hundred, and then climbed higher. rays of sunlight on her skin, heating her from the outside in, leaving her feeling toasty and buzzing. constantly energetic as she was, a day out lent her ever more stamina, unlike those who grew lethargic if outside for too long. her mother was like that, complaining constantly, keeping the air on high.

new york has the capability of being hot but the winters are harsh and unforgiving. stella hates the snow, and sheโ€™s not a fan of the rain, or cloudy days, or a windchill lower than the average temperature. her first few years are spent inside, avoiding the falling snow and iced over sidewalks. she goes so far as to skip class, never having invested in any winter wear. she blames her mother for it for not better preparing her.

the peopleโ€ฆ

stellaโ€™s friends back home had been of like mind: outgoing, adventurous, one priority at a time. she met them at school, or while playing in the neighborhood, or during excursions through washes after a storm in the mountains. they were daredevils and thrill seekers and stella had never felt so at ease with herself. she could forget her past, forget her years of pageantry, forget the look in her mothersโ€™ eyes the night stella had had enough.

stellaโ€™s friends in new york were different: introverted, cautious, of many talents. she met them at school, whether it was in class, or by being dorm neighbors, or attending whatever event the faculty thought would bring them all together. they were from all different walks of life and stellaโ€™s confidence had plummeted. sheโ€™d begun to fake it, to appear as put together as the rest of them, but all that accomplished was annoying those around her.

then she had met eddie and jackson and nahnie and pennie and aurora and parker.

they had few things in common but one recurring trait stella slowly noticed of them was the belief they had in her. on her worst days, they helped to pick her up, whether it was by a song, craft, flower crown. on her best, they encouraged her behavior, promising her she could be herself around them, that she wouldnโ€™t scare them off.

it still took her a very long time to grow comfortable enough to trust them enough, to let them see beyond her bravado. eddie had been first, chipping slowly at the mask, just like he did most things. from their bets to a wedding in boston to an academy only invite to a weekend at coney island, stella had realized just how eddie wasnโ€™t so much her complete opposite as he was her best complement.

pennie was easy to connect with, a long forgotten meeting at a casino reminding stella of how well theyโ€™d gotten along originally. nahnie reminded her of friends back home, fireworks set off of rooftops and acceptance of new crazy ideas. parker felt like an alternate universe version of herself and she could always trust him to film a vine with her. aurora was the maternal figure stella often lacked and jackson was the older brother sheโ€™d never had.

the people made stella miss home a lot less. if her parents had never made the decision to move to the other side of the country, stella might have never met her friends, and she canโ€™t imagine life now without them. aurora keeping her from making reckless decisions has probably saved her from drowning in a monsoon flood. eddie tutoring her in her worst subjects will probably get her farther in schooling than she could ever have hoped. pennieโ€™s unfailing positivity had pulled stella from what might have been many a dark Day.

and while stella would love to show them the city she grew up in, for them to experience an arizona sunset, sheโ€™s content with watching sunrises with them, admiring the shades of color that stretch across the sky. thereโ€™s sure to be visits back, to see grandparents, and stella would never say no to them. she doesnโ€™t think her mother would let her, anyway. she wouldnโ€™t be surprised if new york soon becomes to feel more like home than arizona does.

she isn't sure if she wants that but she supposes it wouldnโ€™t be terrible. as long as the two states are the only ones she ever has to settle in, then she doesnโ€™t mind. she couldnโ€™t imagine another move, somewhere even more frigid, or less friendly. it takes some time for stella to get used to her new surroundings, never having liked change, and it took well over a year before new york had begun to grow on her. and, again, that had been thanks to her friends.

namely, it had been eddie, but he did not need to know that.

aurora and nahnie didnโ€™t need to know it, either, and for that matter, jackson could stay in the dark on it as well.

alright, so maybe nobody needed to know that eddie had made new york feel like home for stella.

eddie makes just about anywhere feel like home for stella which is something sheโ€™s still trying to understand. there isnโ€™t quite the disconnect between mind and body when sheโ€™s with him. she sleeps well every night, all of her restlessness fading the moment he lays beside her. he keeps her calm when sheโ€™s reaching the breaking point, helps her to see things a bit more rationally. he often insists she has no reason to apologize and even when she does, because she always does, he doesnโ€™t grow sick of her despite it. she loves him very much.

on the rare days where she is awake before the sun, she rouses eddie as well (if he isnโ€™t already), and drags him out to watch the sunrise with her. the light dusting of clouds adds such a soft quality to the bright colors and she sighs happily, leaning into him, soaking in his presence as much as she does the rays of light.

one of these days, sheโ€™ll take him to arizona. maybe during the winter so he wonโ€™t suffer quite as much in the heat. se just wants to share the fiery burning skies of a sunset with him, so he can understand just what she likes about them so much. she wants to share lots of things with him and itโ€™s a relief to know just how much time they have.

ยฉ laurie.

stella r. hines
 Posted: Jan 23 2017, 03:23 AM

a moment
365 days of writing

it is moments like these that she will never forget.

itโ€™s easy to lose memories like this to depression, to a well buried voice whispering in her ear at the worst of times. this is why she likes taking photos and videos, to have events documented, so that she has solid proof of when things were good. she knows that things tend to be good more often than they do bad but then sheโ€™ll have a Day. and when she has a Day, it feels like there arenโ€™t any good things left in the world.

but this moment, this memory, is something she doesnโ€™t think will ever be tarnished.

sheโ€™s laying on an unfamiliar floor in an unfamiliar room, surrounded by things and people she is unfamiliar with, save for the one person who matters the most.

eddie is still catching his breath, just as she is, and she allows her eyes a moment to linger. she had just admitted defeat, adding to eddieโ€™s list of wins, and despite her attitude, she actually didnโ€™t mind all that much. he was having fun and she thought that was more important than anything else. if seeing eddie laugh like this meant losing, then maybe it wouldnโ€™t hurt if it happened a bit more often.

the distant chatter of wedding guests on the floor below, eddieโ€™s slightly mussed hair from falling off the bed, the soft rug against her skin, the air returning to her lungs in full breaths.

these were small pieces of a large picture and that made it all the more precious to her. she might have been hesitant to attend this event for a number of reasons, but she thought this single moment right here would make it all worth it.

she could face meeting eddieโ€™s father tomorrow, and she could deal with wearing a dress, and she could handle sharing the bed tonight.

because that was what sheโ€™d just suggested, hadnโ€™t she? what should have been awkward felt easy to her even as she instantly scolded her filter for being absolutely useless. logically (she felt this single word could convince him if nothing else), it made sense. there was enough room for them both and she liked eddie well enough (much more than that) that she didnโ€™t mind sleeping beside him.

and he liked her, too. she didnโ€™t think heโ€™d meant to say it but the five words sent warmth down her spine, all the way to her fingertips and toes. she returned the sentiment, hoping he wouldnโ€™t mind her so openly sharing her feelings, before disappearing into the bathroom.

she wondered if she was really glowing as much as her reflection seemed to be. if she thought eddieโ€™s hair was tousled, hers was an absolute mess of knots. while brushing it out, she admired the way her lips simply couldnโ€™t turn down, the rosy blush to her cheeks, the way the light hit her eyes. she looked happy and she hoped it would linger for the rest of the weekend.

ยฉ laurie.

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